River Lune - December 2011

Registered Company No 2612775

The return of normality on the Lune

I have to confess that I’ve been getting a bit concerned about my paddling recently – on two consecutive river trips I have failed to swim – I’ve wobbled, smashed into rocks, drifted down drops backwards, even followed Dig’s lead down a couple of rapids – but to no avail. In a desperate attempt to remedy things I joined a select band – Les, Jess and Nick - on a section of the Lune just before Christmas. Not just any section – but the site of my first ever river trip about 8 years ago where owing to the fact that I had to act as responsible(?) adult for my son, I was on a wholly unsuitable stretch of river and swam 11 (yes, eleven) times in a day and a half!

It is a fantastic stretch of river, consistent grade 2 and 3 rapids with a couple of harder sections added in. With only four of us, faffing was kept to a bare minimum and we were on the river in good time. Nick’s tales of hippo-avoidance and what to do if faced by crocodiles, gleaned from his recent trip to Uganda, were an entertaining if not entirely relevant way of spending the early part of the trip and by mid morning I was resolutely upright and sneakily wondering whether I would get to lunch time unscathed – I wouldn’t!

Les has a range of tried, tested and effective river leadership styles and the one that he had employed up to this point was an airy, nonchalant “you’ll be fine, find your own line down” – as we rounded a bend in the river his style went up a notch as I was summarily directed to “sit in that eddy” and await a signal. His final words as he temporarily disappeared from view were “there’s a big rock at the bottom – watch out for it”. True to form I spotted the rock, I watched the rock, I hit the rock, I hugged the rock and finally I bounced off the rock and capsized into the river’s welcoming embrace.

Things were back to normal and as I spluttered my way to the bank I’m sure I heard Les mutter “only 10 more swims to go”. As it turned out there was only one more to go but it provided a good illustration of another facet of Les’s leadership skills – his command of a range of shouty voices.

Approaching, what I now know to be called the Strid, Les pointed to the eddy where he wanted us to be, and with a minimum of fuss Nick and Jess did as they were requested. Being seduced by Les’s gentle tone, and thinking that the eddy looked a bit crowded (and small) I suggested that I’d go for the next one only to see Les’s whole demeanour change and a voice like a foghorn demand that I “get in this eddy NOW!” Well, I did my best, nearly made it, dropped out of the bottom of the eddy, turned backwards, drifted back in to the flow and tackled the Strid in reverse gear.

Thinking that this was a little advanced even for me, I tried to turn to face the front, got half way and had my second dip of the day. As we all know, Les has a number of different shouty voices for these situations and personally I prefer the calmer “just grab the back of my boat, you’re fine” kind, but this one was at the other end of the scale and I was left in no doubt that Les wanted me to “drop everything, keep your feet up and swim like hell” – so I did but not before taking in a few bumps, scrapes and mouthfuls of the Lune. Having reached dry land I was able to watch with considerable respect as Nick and Jess showed me how it should be done and even had the good grace to save their laughter until I was out of earshot.

That was the end of the dramas for the day as we completed the rest of the trip unscathed. A great day in so many ways – a beautiful river, excellent company, minimal faffing, an object lesson in leadership and shouting styles, but most of all a personal return to normality – after all what would paddling be without the occasional swim?

Mark Limmer